Tuesday, October 17, 2006

Venice: In my own alley?


Do you think this is a Venetian canal?
Are you riding in a gondola?
Do you hear sweet music?

No, bitch. Why, you ask?

There's a stretch of alleyway between where I reside and share with at least 5 other households/ families. And...

Every time it rains-- I'm not talking torrents, but OH, when it has-- there's this 75-foot stretch of alleyway that just simply CAN'T DRAIN A THANG.

Our garbage-cans float around, regardless of the filth within (can't help it- law of dumpy gravity), animals like cats and dogs that get out of their yards skirt this area like it's fucking moat (which it is) and cars going thru leave a nice wake....

What's going on? Super Dirt? Tree-roots? Bodies?

I've most recently gotten in touch with some streets n' sanitation dude. He says he's going to send an investigator to scope the alley.

Ooooh! A man in a trenchcoat. A super-private-eye. Coming to peruse the scene!

Dare I say that anything could possibly be done? I suppose that's all up to the monkey in the trenchcoat. Huh.


Blogger Lorelei said...

Don't forget to scroll over the title. It links to a silly little "in m alley video" I done made.

10/17/2006 8:02 PM  
Blogger Old Man Crowder said...

What a great Chicago accent, you have!

I loved the part about how you got wet because that hotdog drove by. Is that really all it takes? Oh wait...You meant wet from the super-puddle, I guess.

And I'm thinkin' it's a dead cat backing up the drain somewheres.

10/18/2006 6:18 PM  
Anonymous Cletus Warhol said...

Hey boddy! Don't be makin funna Lahralies's accent, dere! She can't help dat shees frahm Chagagga.

10/19/2006 1:27 AM  
Blogger Lorelei said...

Ol' Man Orangutan: What nice, punctuation you, have!

As far as my "Chicago" accent... you haven't heard anything. I'm far from worst.

Autumn allergies don't help that delightful nasal twaaang.

By the way-- the inspector from Chicago Sewer and Possible Imbedded Objects Within came by.

He thinks there's a coupla Canadians crammed down there.

Tee hee! ; ) I keeed! I Keeeeed!

10/19/2006 10:16 AM  
Blogger Old Man Crowder said...

Ouch. Took a pummelling on that one, eh? EH?

It can't be Canadians blocking the pipes. Our beavers are always slick.

10/19/2006 6:41 PM  

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