Tuesday, November 14, 2006

I'm Getting So Bad at Updating Stuff and Stuff...

...Not that I have a real audience or anything, but I'll apologize anyways: Solly!
Aside from keeping me way busy, work has too many stories for me to not feel like I'd be violating HIPPAA regulations if I went into detail about, oh, say the homicidal freak we had to cart from a house of ill repute in East Joliet to a psych ward in a hospital up here in Chicago... or the Russian lady who simply would NOT part from her "Jell-o and the milks" when we came to take her for her daily dialysis appointment... or the little ol' black lady we picked up who-- bless her surly cuteness!-- could not be anything more than an escapee from The Muppet Show.

So I won't go into detail. But LOOK AT MY PAN-SEARED ASS!!!

WhoooHoooo, doggie! See, this is what happens when you fall asleep while using one of them heating pads what fer to relieve yer aching lower back.

So, it DID relieve my aching lower back, but now I've got some sort of weird Star-Trek alien sunburn-butt. Behold!

I can now say that I've actually gone and cooked myself. What the hell?


Blogger Old Man Crowder said...

Looks like one of those braniac ink-blot tests.

Doc: "Unt ZEES von? Vat do you zee?"

Me: "I see two dogs fucking."

Doc: "Again? You zay zat for evryzing!"

11/14/2006 7:35 PM  
Blogger Lorelei said...

You mean Ass-blot test.

11/14/2006 9:27 PM  
Blogger Laura said...

mmmm....slow roasted chickenladybutt.

11/15/2006 2:10 AM  
Blogger Laura said...

I know it's 2 a.m. and all, but I swear to god I see Foghorn Leghorn's head on your right side.

11/15/2006 2:14 AM  
Blogger Laura said...

And a harpie on the other.

11/15/2006 10:40 AM  
Anonymous Cletus Warhol said...

Your visitor stats are going to soar now that you're featuring soft core burn porn.

11/18/2006 2:35 PM  
Blogger Laura said...


(I ate so friggin' much I STILL can't get to sleep. 'Tis the gaseousness, methinks. Or the Prednisone. Either way, 'taint fun...)

Hope ye didnae hae to drive too many old turkeys around in the woo-woo van on yer hollerday. And I hope you at least scared the ones you did with that insane bird call you do.


11/24/2006 1:59 AM  
Blogger Lorelei said...

Done and done.

11/27/2006 10:57 PM  

Post a Comment

<< Home